Please don't piss in the flower beds!

So two weeks ago I closed on a new house and it sits on 2.5 acres.  I purchased it from an old couple and this is how she planted her...

Women like flowers and toilet water but not real toilet water and not with the flowers stuck in it.

It's Mother's Day, did you get mom any flowers? 

Flowers and redneck wine, oh yeah Bubba's getting lucky tonight!  I think the folks at teleflorist should take note of this arrangement.

This is one of those Valentines that keeps giving not only does she get flowers but your boots smell a little better.  Who needs odor eaters, you simply need a...