Well on the bright side it does absorb blood but dude its a freakin' tampon duct tape to your arm!!!!

At what point do dead bugs become art?  Oh yeah when you doodle pictures around them.

Think she will notice that instead of a real flower there is only a post it note saying "Flower"?  Just give her a few drinks first and I'm sure you...

It's Mother's Day, did you get mom any flowers? 

Dad would have had a bumper sticker too but they booted him out of the 3rd grade for not shaving.

  Why not celebrate mom by watching some family movies. staring Mommy, Daddy and Uncle Bill.